Almost halfway through a though-filling week

The current week seems to be my "Nikki, get in line" week. I was asked for a moment by a classmate about five minutes ago (from typing this sentence) and he said that he likes that I ask questions for conversation and fill long periods of silence by making people thing, there are times that my tone makes people uncomfortable (though I strive for it not to) and that my body language doesn't always match up with my thought process/is taken wrong. I asked a guest speaker about a sentence in his mission statement about to do business they "care enough about the person" to enter business with them. I wasn't questioning the man's intentions, I was trying to ask what that meant, more clearly. The classmate said that after I asked the question I seemed disinterested in the answer and, although what I was actually doing was typing it down and making sure I was taking it down properly, to him it seemed I had not cared about the answer and was just dinking around after asking. He said I don't discomfort him all the time, and that it is few and far between, but "as we are representatives of our majors, ourselves and our cohorts" we should all be aware of tonality and body language during guest presentations. Oddly enough, the other guest presentation he brought up the presenter told me she was honestly glad for my questions and hadn't thought of those things before. I know I don't intend to sound agressive and rude, and I am actually thoughtful and just asking clarification (or in class discussions challenging an idea because the whole point of the class is to do so) but somehow I am magically able to come off completely wrong.

I do tell people to please tell me if I offend them or make them uncomfortable so maybe we can clear the air and clear up misunderstandings. I don't get offended if people tell me that I didn't convey myself properly an, though it hurts to realize that I f***ed up yet again, I am thankful that people do tell me so I can fix the problem. I think another problem is that while I am thinking, my tone doesn't regulate properly, so as I had thought out the question and figured on less offensive wording, the tone as I was working on making sure my word choice was appropriate ended up sounding wrong. *sigh* I do think a lot about what I ask in class and at guest lectures before I ask the question. I try to make sure the wording is unoffensive and conveys my desire to understand instead of 'picking on' or 'being rude to' the guest speaker or my classmates. Seems I need to go back to Tone and Body Language 101, because there have been a number of misunderstandings lately. Or I need to take a break from stress, school, and life and fix the imbalances in my brain and the disconnects between brain and mouth, and now apparently the rest of my body.

I have also always had a strong personality, which has been accentuated by this environment despite my desire for it not to and my many attempts to keep my strong personality in check. A lot of people find a strong personality offputting and abrasive. And I know a lot of people are sensitive to tone and body language. I am just working on it. I am not a finished project in the least and need to work on polishing my tone and body language so that I am not misunderstood and not seen as offensive/abrasive/abrupt/edgy.

So this week is my "tell Nikki what she is doing wrong" week, so please let me know so I can put it on the list of things to be working on.
~N